Ask And It Is Given

I believe in a responsive universe. Ask and you will receive. It's that simple. The universe responds to true need. It's the cornerstone concept of all universal laws; Ask and it is given.

What's not so simple is accepting that you may get exactly what you asked.

And that there is absolutely a reaction to every action, the laws of physics aren't really all that different from the laws of metaphysics.

I've seen this in action throughout my life. The converse is also true, for me anyway. Anytime I state an absolute "I will not"  sure enough, I'm going to have to have that experience. So I try to stay flexible with my thoughts. Sometimes I'm more successful than others. A lot depends on how diligent I've been in maintaining my meditation practice.

For the last few years I've spent a great deal of time longing for more time in my day. My work life and home life were filled with stress and all I wanted was unstructured time. It was the deepest desire of my soul and in my thoughts constantly.  Sure enough, the universe responded and six months ago, my job disappeared and I had nothing but time on my hands.

I should have been a bit more specific about how I wanted more time to manifest itself.

Honestly, I wasn't too surprised. Management changes at my old employer were in progress and I'd been expecting to be cut for the prior six months, which really added to the anxiety I was already feeling about life. The day before it happened, a coworker had called to vent about her position being cut. I knew mine my next.

The timing was bad. I'd just scheduled my weight loss surgery and now my last day was going to be a mere 5 days before the surgery and about 2 weeks before Christmas. Nice time to not have a paycheck and health benefits.  Not.

So here I am six months later.I got my heart's desire and time is exactly what I needed. Time to heal from many years at a job that was not in alignment with my own ethics and beliefs. Time to heal my physical body. Time to recharge my creative energies. Time to examine what matters.  Time to realize if not now, when?

It is a responsive universe. All will be well.

The Nine of Pentacles; It's a Good Life

As my personal card for 2014, I drew the Nine of Pentacles.  Although this card's theme speaks to my personal journey in 2014, like all things tarot it's influences are interwoven with the  yearly cards, I've  Wheel of Fortune and the Four of Pentacles that I've previously discussed.

The first things I notice are the home and car on the card. They're very similar to the home and car of the Four of Pentacles. They symbolize security to me. Safety. They also represent the rewards of hard work. For some, homes and cars are status. Overall, this is a scene of refinement and contentment, as though we've caught the lady at a moment of self reflection. There are many symbols of "the good life" in this card; fresh fruits, wine in a delicate goblet, the golden ring and bracelet, a diamond necklace and head band. Her hands are well manicured and she's holding a key in her right hand. Is this the key to success? The key to her home? The key to her future? Or possibly, the key to a door that she's locked to her past?

Notice the look in her eyes. She's not looking out into the lovely garden. It's almost as though she's not able to see the beauty of her surroundings and relax into the life she's created.  Or perhaps these things are are still just beyond her grasp and we've caught her in a moment of  realizing that they are within her reach if only she stays with the course of action and hard work that has brought her to this point.

This isn't the most traditional understanding of this card, but I see it as a distinct possibility; notice how she is sitting at a window with the beautiful view behind her. She's achieved a great many of her goals, we can tell that by her sense of self confidence and her presence.  Yet, there is also a sense of mystery and incompleteness here. While she's not directly looking over her shoulder, there is definitely something just outside our view that has attracted her attention. Her gaze is alert and almost wary, as though she's spied some potential danger in the distance and must not allow herself to become too complacent.

Combine this card with the Wheel of Fortune and the Four of Pentacles and wow...this could be a spectacular year. It could be filled with rewarding and challenging work. It's a year of huge transition that demands a great deal of self direction, attention and willingness to step up and out with confidence. But, as the Wheel turns, elements change and it's important to stay ahead of the wheel in order to achieve the success depicted in the Nine of Pentacles.

Tarot for the New Year 2014

On New Years Day I always draw a few tarot cards for an overview of the year's themes. More often than not by the end of the year I can see themes that directly correlate to the New Year's cards.

This year despite still being in a bit of a post surgical fog, I drew my cards and took a quick photo to record them. I knew these were powerful cards for me deserving of my full consideration. The first card, Nine of Pentacles, is my personal card for 2014. The Wheel of Fortune and the Four of Pentacles are the themes for 2014.  I can't remember ever having all three of these cards in combo before. Considering how 2013 ended, in a nutshell, this should be my best year in a long time! 

Let's start with the Wheel of Fortune. Its standing as a Major Arcana card is significant. There are powerful energetic forces at play and this is a card that reminds us to remember that life is constantly in flux. The wheel keeps turning..thankfully! It reminds us of the cycles in life and even though life may be challenging, it will pass and the next cycle could be full of rewarding, positive energy. I often think of this card as the "karma card".   Things happen. We're not always in control of all aspects in our life.  But that doesn't mean that we must allow external influences to create our lifetime experience. 

When the Wheel of Fortune appears, it is important to recognize the external influences but also that we can still create the outcome you desire. How? By taking advantage of the most basic function of a wheel... movement. The energy of the Wheel can be used to help us move past the obstacles in our way. This can be an important time in your life where major changes are either already in play or you may be on the cusp of a major choice point. The Wheel tell us that staying centered and balanced will allow us to direct the movement of the successful energy associated with the Wheel.  Key words you might to use for the Wheel of Fortune are: success, new ventures, growth, movement, flexibility, luck.

 The second card for 2014 I drew as a clarifying card for the Wheel of Fortune. Immediately recognizing the potential in the Wheel, I wanted to know how to make the most of the opportunities it represents. My card is the Four of Pentacles. Traditionally, this card is in direct opposition to the Wheel of Fortune. Where the Wheel is a trust your gut and move on card, the Four of Pentacles is usually thought of as somewhat miserly, depicting someone who has achieved status and security and is desperate to keep control. This guy isn't about to give up a thing.  It's a card for someone who doesn't enjoy change and feels threatened by it.  Ha!  Exactly the opposite of the energy storm the Wheel is bringing!

I can't say that I don't see the cosmic irony here given how I've been feeling about my own life changes. 

But I also see something more in the Four of Pentacles. My style of tarot reading is a blend of traditional meanings combined with a very large helping of my own intuitive understand of the card. My card interpretations may also vary for the same card from deck to deck and depending on the person I'm reading for.   My card is from the Cosmic Tarot. Now compare it to the Rider Waite card above. So, here's how I read the Four of Pentacles as a clarifying card to the Wheel of Fortune.

The Four of Pentacles is about being secure in your experience and work. The way to achieve the success promised by the Wheel of Fortune is to rely on the skill set that has brought you success. We see a man who appears to be educated, he uses his mental abilities to get ahead. He seems to be counseling the woman, who interestingly bears a resemblance to the woman on the Nine of Pentacles (my personal card for the year). He surrounded by the material goods that we associate with a good life; house, car, nice clothing, tasteful furnishings, books. His essence is controlled, in charge and stable. I sense communication as an important element of this card. It's represented by the telephone and the direct way he's looking at the woman. Even though she is demurely looking away, he is direct with her. He may also be a little too stuck in his ways. Her perspective on life might encourage new ideas for him, so it would be worth his time to allow her to speak her mind and listen without judgement.

Together, I see these cards for 2014 as very auspicious. This can be a year of great accomplishment and personal satisfaction. It won't be easy, there's the issues of maintaining my center, letting go of the fear of the unknown and trusting in the universe to provide. There is a foundation for growth and expansion. Opportunity comes from knowing myself and my abilities.  Should be an interesting year! 

My personal card, the Nine of Pentacles is a complement to these yearly theme cards. I'll talk about it in a separate post.  Now, I'm curious... are there milestones in life that cause you to turn to tarot?

How Did It Get To Be February Already?

The beginning of 2014 was challenging for me. December had been filled with major life events and I was still reeling from the impact. I unexpectedly lost my job through no doing of my own. I was in my sixth year with this company and I felt secure. Wrong. I’d also made the decision back in November to have weight loss surgery. The weight loss roller coaster is one I’ve been on since I was 9 years old.

I was absolutely sure of this decision but I also knew that it meant significant lifestyle changes. Surgery was scheduled for Dec. 18 right in the midst of all the holiday baking and celebrating…the majority of it centered around food.  I’ve never chosen the easy way to do anything. So why start now, right?

So December was filled with anxiety from positive and negative sources. Stressful. But I made it through the rigorous pre-op phase fairly easily and so when surgery day arrived, I knew I would and could become a success story.   I’d previously decided to sideline the lack of employment until I was fully recovered and that was a good decision. I just didn’t realize exactly how stressed out I was, how long it would take my head to clear and how easily I would fall into the funk of zombie like days.

But I don’t want to continue like an extra in The Walking Dead. A writer who isn’t writing is a pretty pathetic creature and not someone I’m happy with being.  So it’s time to think. It's time to write.

Sleepy Hollow 2013 Finale

Does anyone else watch Sleepy Hollow? Despite playing wild and loose with history, I love this show. It's clever and fun. Something is bugging me to death about the huge revelation regarding Henry Parrish, the Sin Eater. Don't read any further if you haven't watched the season finale yet.  I'm on a rant.

I love John Noble as Henry Parrish in this show, but to see him as thirty-something Icabod Crane's son is ridiculous. Stay with me here, we're in alt time now. Icabod cheats death in the Revolutionary War and wakes up in 2013 Sleepy Hollow, not having aged a day since his "demise." Ok. I can live with this.  He's dashing and that helps.

But in the season finale, Crane's son is revealed to be the sixty-five-ish Henry, who we also know was killed as a teenager or at the very least early twenties young man. We also learn that Henry came back to live approximately twenty years earlier, so in theory he could have aged during those years and now be about the same age as his father, Icabod Crane. I like the twist of the Sin Eater being Crane's son, but either the casting or the timeline is totally off.   Apparently, this twist was in the works for a long time, according to this interview with executive producer Mark Goffman.  Which makes me wonder how everyone overlooked this odd bit of casting.

What were they thinking?

Fall Equinox- Moving Forward

The fall equinox always feels like renewal to me. I tend to wither in the heat of the summer and September always finds me starting new projects. Big things tend to happen to me in the early fall. Today I have drawn one card from the Aquarian Tarot for a message on what do I need to attend to for the next three months to move forward.

My first reaction to this card, Judgement, was a big HA! Two days ago I had a fairly big disagreement with my mother about being so judgemental. I believe we're all judgemental at our essence level. It's the ability we tap into as we accept some idea and cast away others. But it tends to get out of hand and becomes a powerful negative attribute. It also happens to be one of the things I'm working hardest on to release in my own spiritual work. And skeptics might say Tarot has no relationship to anything.

In this beautiful card, I'm first drawn to the angel sounding a clarion call. The banner hanging from the horn reminds me of battle standards. The sun is peeking up behind the clouds, illumination at the brink of daybreak. All of these symbols are telling me that it is time to let go of the uncertainty that's been clouding my mind. Something big is calling to me, it's time to stop looking behind me, stop the self examination and step up into what is my true self. There is a time to dwell on the past (hopefully learning from it) but it is time to uncloud my mind and heed the call of my inner spirit.

The judgment card shows up very often just as you're on the brink of a major life event. It is heralding the dawn of a new day. If you draw this card and it's message is not crystal clear to you, take it as a tip to sit quietly and listen to your spirit. Ten minutes of meditation daily will help you hear your heart's messages. If you are facing a major decision and pull Judgement, I'd advise slowing down and reviewing all of your options. Get clear about your feelings. Sometimes the best solution is not the one that makes the most logical sense, but only you can decide.

Ace of Cups Reversed

Meet the Ace of Cups, Reversed. The Card of the Day that practically guarantees an emotionally charged, difficult day. Aces are the "Power" cards of the minor arcana. When your card lands upright, an Ace is a wonderful harbinger of potential and positive activity in its realm. Reversed, as mine is today, it's got the power  but it makes for a much more challenging experience.

The suit of Cups is all about emotions, intuition, feelings and all matters of the heart. A reversed card tells of the disappointments, broken promises, hurt feelings, holding emotional emptiness, feeling sad or depressed.  This cup isn't overflowing with joy, its drained.

A reversed Ace of Cups can also be telling you that you've been holding your true feelings in check for too long and you are feeling stressed about it. You might have very good logical reasons for doing so, but you must ask yourself about the emotional toll it's taking.

The Card of Day  reading has an uncanny way of  influencing your day. I like to draw my card in the quiet of the morning and while I don't dwell on it, I try to stay observant for it's energies during the day. Today, this Ace made its self impossible to ignore. As my day started I was feeling energized and optimistic about taking a big bite out of a project I'm working on. Solidly stayed on track for about 3 hours.

Then an email  arrived, payment of an invoice for work I had done was not made on Friday as expected.  Trying not to take my annoyance out on the messenger, I asked why and stated that nonpayment was outside the work agreement. Poor guy said he had no knowledge of any agreement. There goes my equilibrium. This isn't the first time there has been payment issues. I believe he didn't know.  I am in this situation of my own choosing, I could remedy it by simply walking away.  Logically, that's not in my best interest right now. Emotionally, I'm really angry but after venting to a friend who knows all the details, I suck it back up and continue on.

Next up, my daughter drops by for an unexpected visit. I never see here often enough. I was looking forward to putting the pain-in-the-ass problem aside and enjoying her visit. That didn't quite go the way I thought. Her house has been out to get her this past month. Plumbing issues, fix. Dishwasher dies, fix. Another water issue that involved replacing a floor and coping with mold issues. Fix. Dead bolt eating keys, fix.... now, honestly, who ever had a deadbolt break? And then as if all that wasn't enough, a power blip of less than a minute two days ago fried her central air. Apparently that little blip killed a large number of air conditioners in our town and there are no parts to be had until later today.  We live in Texas. It's still 100 outside.  She has three cats and two ferrets, making a hotel impossible. And to make it worse, to fix the AC, a portion of the outside wall of her home will have to be cut away as it was improperly installed in the first place.

You can imagine how perky she was. Poor thing.

The balance of the day consisted of pesky coworkers who seemed to have left their brains at home. Getting distracted and burning cookies. Squabble over completely inane issue with my mother. Chiding myself for making cookies in the first place since I know that they are emotionally triggered self-soothing evil entities.

This is how a reversed Ace of Cups might play out. The details in your life will be different but I'm sure you'll recognize the patterns. For now I continue to wrestle with myself. I have no one but myself to point the finger at for this latest round of broken promises and emotional abuse and I do have this reversed Ace of Cups to thank for this realization. Until today, I had not crystallized the entire mess into coherent thought. It was just a spaghetti mess of feelings in a big deep bowl.  I am swallowing my anger and eating it in lovely buttery cookie form. This really isn't good.  I'm adding a new meaning for the reversed Ace of Cups to my personal tarot lexicon; emotional eating. Sometimes you can't escape the truth in the tarot.